Well here's a great quote for you from Picasso:
"I AM ALWAYS DOING THAT WHICH I CANNOT DO, IN ORDER THAT I MAY LEARN HOW TO DO IT."
If this is your first Christmas "alone" after having been married for many years, I know how hard it can be. It's like being on another planet. We don't realize how entwined we are with a partner, in all ways, even if we weren't getting along, until there's a breakup. You may have really no idea how to spend Christmas alone, or what to do.
You may also lack the emotional and mental energy to put something together. You may want to just cancel Christmas and spend the day reading or hiking or something. That's ok. There' no one judging this, hopefully most of all, not YOU.
You see it takes mental and emotional energy - - emotional intelligence - - to CREATE something, and what you have to do is create a new kind of Christmas, after years of maybe doing the same things with the same person or people.
Typically when we divorce, we lose a "family" as well. With the death of a spouse, it may be different in that respect, but still, things are not the same.
If you're still raw emotionally, and heart broken, you have to stay with the feelings, and your real friends will understand. You just may not be able to participate in Christmas at this time.
If you are farther along in your healing, or feel like moving ahead, it's an ideal time to learn to deal with the changes. Your friends and loved ones can help you!
In fact I overheard a wonderful conversation at a restaurant the other night. Two women were dining, and one was saying to the other, "Yes, I know you miss him, but you still need friends. No matter what happens, you need friends. Please come to this party."
I hope the other woman decided to. She looked about 70 and had lost her husband, and her friend was encouraging her to do one of the most important things we can do at such a time - - stay connected. It keeps you from getting too much into the downside of things!
If you don't feel like being with old friends, because of memories, or have lost part of your social network through a divorce, you can be around people by participating in a church, or doing volunteer work at the holidays. Whatever works for you.
Music can be very healing at this time, and we invite you to join our active and dedicated CLUB VIVO PER LEI / I LIVE FOR MUSIC. We listened to the Met's broadcast of Rigoletto this past Saturday - - many of us being on car trips, a great time to listen to an opera. The commentarty was just marvelous, all about Verdi's theme of father and daughter, the Austrian occupation of northern Italy at the time, and the problem with the censors. Fascinating, and it added so much to the experience and enjoyment of the opera.
Need some healing crytals for the New Year? Nancy Fenn's offering a great special - - check it out HERE.
Are you taking care of your health? There are two times I've noticed when clients tend to get sick. Well winter of course, but then when they've just started a new serious romance, and when they've ended one. These are very stressful times that take their toll on our immune system. Did you know that emotions directly effect the immune system?
Our immune system is our FIRST line of defense against bacteria, and our ONLY line of defense against viruses. (It's true. Ask your doctor.) We recommend a heart regimen of neutraceuticals from ARBONNE. DefenseBuilder and Get Well Soon Dietary Supplement are scientifically proven to nutritionally support the immune system. Get on them NOW and stay well. You may do OK, but other people who don't take care of themselves will be sick and will be around you with their germs, so at this vulnerable time, it's best to get on a strict health regime. You can show safely with me online at My Arbonne. Email me if you need help!
I AM AVAILABLE FOR SPOT COACHING CALLS. One session is fine, and often is all it takes. If you need a call please email me to set a time - sdunn@susandunn.cc. It could be just the thing! I work night and weekends, for your convenience.
Origin: pickup-techniques.blogspot.com
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